Monday, January 13, 2020

Ranger Jim's Ramblings for January.

Walker, Texas Ranger? NOT!

Today I'll take on the person most people today think of when they think of the Texas Rangers. Chuck Norris's character Texas Ranger Cordell Walker in the long running TV series, "Walker, Texas Ranger".

I'll be the first to admit I enjoyed the show, more so in its earlier seasons, when the Walker character was more of a cowboy type. As it veered more and more into science fiction, matrtial arts, and the romance between Walker and Assistant D.A. Alex, it became too much farce.

The serices was so full of inaccuracies it was comical. I'll list most of the major ones, but I'm certain I'll still miss some. 

I'll start by pointing out the real Texas Rangers, almost to a man and woman, hated the Walker character, but not for the reasons you might think. They couldn't stand his scruffy appearance, and most of all his black hat. More on that to come

First, right from the git-go, in the pilot episode, Walker would have been bounced off the force, stripped of his badge, and charged with police brutality and murder. Of course, this went on for the entire series. Walker killed enough bad guys tin numbers approximately the same as the entire population of the state of Rhode Island. (Official Name: The State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations. Our smallest state has the longest official name of all 50).

Back to Walker's appearance.  Unlike the frontier Rangers, today's Rangers have a strict dress and grooming code. Unless circumstances, such as being undercover or in a hazmat area, require other clothing, Rangers MUST wear a white, or light blue dress shirt, tan, brown, or dark blue or black khaki or dress slacks, polished Western boots, a western belt, and a WHITE Western hat, or in the summer, a light-colored straw Western hat, and a necktie. The shirts and slacks must be starched and pressed, with a crease in the pant legs. No facial hair of any kind is allowed, nor any hair that is not neatly cut (obviously, for female Rangers, they are allowed to wear their hair longer.) Walker qualified on none of these counts.

Next, Walker's partner. Ranger's don't work in pairs. Each Ranger is assigned a large territory, which he or she covers by themselves, bringing in another Ranger when needed. Going into another Ranger's territory without their permission is strictly verboten. Therefore, Ranger TRivette would have had his own territory.

Even more ridiculous was C.D. Parker, caling himself a "semi-retired" Texas Ranger. No such animal. He would have been arrested for impersonating an officer of the law.

In the series, Alex was cast at Walker's boss, along with the mayor of Dallas. Bull. Rangers don't answer to mayors, or d.a.'. They are members of the Department of Public Safety. They work for the state of Texas, and their authority supercedes that of any local or other state law officers. Not ot mention Walker's and Alex's love fest would be considered inappropriate fraternizing. They both would have been reprimanded at the lest, then fired if they didn't knock it off.

That's not even getting into cars that explode instantly when hit by a bullet (the most notorious example being one that walker hit in the taillight, and the car immediately blows into a million pieces), and the outlaws that always came after Walker one at a time. How convenient for him. Not once did a gang think of swarming over him all at once., and finisheing him off.

There's plenty more, but this should give you the idea. When you stumble across an old WTR episode and decided to watch it, do as I do. Settle back, get ready to laugh, and take it with a pound of salt.

Until next month,

"Ranger" Jim


  1. I hope you're not expecting a Christmas card from Chuck. ;-)

  2. There has always been a wide chasm between reality and movies. Still it was educational to have you point out the differences. Thanks. I echo Franks comment. Doris

  3. I enjoyed watching the Walker Texas Ranger series. I love bigger than life characters, hence my Lucas Hallam character. My agent never understood ol' Lucas. He thought I should tone him down. Then he wouldn't have been Lucas Hallam. I went my merry way and continued with what I enjoyed. Thank goodness it's fiction and doesn't have to follow life's rules. Oh, and I really got a kick out of James getting to write books for the Walker Texas Ranger series. It was all a lot of fun. Which fiction should be. Reality can really suck, and we get enough of that. Bring on the fantasy!

  4. Well, thanks a lot for bursting my bubble. Here I thought all that was real life. (not really) But isn't MAKE BELIEVE the reason we turn on a show to watch on TV or decide which movie we'll be going to see? Otherwise, it would be a DOCUMENTARY--and Lord knows, I have to be just in the right frame of mind to watch one of those when I could turn on an action-packed tv show with a hunky guy who can kick butt and listen...I don't care WHAT kind of shirt he's wearing cause it's more than likely gonna be ripped off by the end of whatever fight he gets into. Real life doesn't always translate well into a fictional story, and when I want to be entertained, I want some rough and tumble, action packed, car exploding, shirt ripping, fraternizing Texas Ranger fiction. Make that a double. Or a triple. Shaken, not stirred.

  5. Jim, I can't speak for anyone else, but I watch shows and movies for the entertainment and the opportunity to escape into a different world for a bit. When I want realism and history, I'll watch Ken Burns' documentaries. I wasn't a die hard Walker, Texas Ranger fan, but I've seen many episodes. I enjoyed them for their entertainment value and that Chuck Norris can walk over hot coals barefoot because the coals will go cold when they see him coming. *wink* Chuck made the show regardless of the historical inaccuracies.